Holidays can be joyful but stressful. Monica shares tips on setting boundaries, simplifying tasks, and prioritizing self-care to navigate the season with balance and find moments of peace.
Holidays can be joyful but stressful. Monica shares tips on setting boundaries, simplifying tasks, and prioritizing self-care to navigate the season with balance and find moments of peace.
Savvy Psychologist is hosted by Dr. Monica Johnson. A transcript is available at Simplecast.
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While holidays are portrayed as magical, joyful times, the reality is that this season often brings with it a unique blend of pressures: shopping lists, financial strain, family dynamics, travel plans, and the social expectation to keep up a cheerful facade. If this resonates with you, know that you’re not alone. Many of us experience heightened stress during the holidays, and the key to finding peace is approaching it with compassion and balance. I, your resident Dr. Grinch is here to give a few tips on how to manage holiday stress!
Welcome back to Savvy Psychologist, I'm your host, Dr. Monica Johnson. Every week on this show, I'll help you face life's challenges with evidence-based approaches, a sympathetic ear, and zero judgment.
One of the biggest sources of holiday stress stems from the pressure to create “perfect” holiday moments—decorated homes, impeccable meals, thoughtful gifts, and a sense of endless cheer. It’s easy to get caught up in these expectations, especially when social media and advertisements paint an idealized picture of the holidays.
Take a moment to reflect on what you truly want out of the season. Is it quality time with loved ones, rest, or moments of joy? Once you know what’s meaningful to you, give yourself permission to let go of the less important tasks or traditions that add unnecessary stress. Remember, it’s okay if everything isn’t perfect. Often, the imperfect moments are the ones we remember most fondly.
Creating a plan can be incredibly helpful in managing holiday stress, but balance is key. List out your holiday activities, such as shopping, cooking, or traveling, and set a timeline to space out these tasks. When you do a little bit at a time, you avoid the last-minute rush that so often causes stress.
However, flexibility is just as important as planning. Unexpected changes are inevitable during the holidays—weather delays, shifts in family plans, or something as simple as not finding the “perfect” gift. Give yourself permission to adjust as needed, practicing a mindset of acceptance over perfection.
During the holidays, it’s common to push self-care aside in favor of making others happy or checking tasks off a list. However, taking care of yourself is essential for managing stress effectively. Regular self-care, even in small amounts, can keep you grounded and better able to handle seasonal pressures.
Here are a few ways to incorporate self-care into the busy holiday season:
Self-care isn’t selfish; it’s a way to replenish yourself so you can engage in holiday activities with a clear mind and open heart.
Holiday gatherings can bring us closer, but they can also involve challenging family dynamics. For many people, seeing extended family can mean encountering unresolved issues, differing opinions, or feeling pressure to uphold family expectations.
To help manage these dynamics, set gentle but firm boundaries. If you’re attending a gathering, decide in advance how much time you’ll spend there, who you’ll interact with, and what topics you’d rather avoid. You can kindly steer conversations away from sensitive topics, or even take a break to recharge if things feel overwhelming.
If setting boundaries feels difficult, remember that protecting your mental and emotional well-being is essential. You’re allowed to prioritize your own peace and comfort.
Gift-giving can be a wonderful part of the holidays, but it can also lead to financial strain and stress. To ease this pressure, consider simpler or alternative ways to show appreciation:
Holiday gatherings and events can feel overwhelming, especially when we’re balancing multiple invitations and family obligations. If you’re feeling stretched thin, consider limiting your engagements and focusing on the gatherings that hold the most meaning for you.
Politely decline events that may feel obligatory, and remember that it’s okay to say no. Your time and energy are valuable resources, and spending them intentionally helps reduce stress. For events you do attend, keep expectations realistic, and don’t feel obligated to stay for the entire time if you’re not feeling up for it.
Gratitude and mindfulness can be powerful antidotes to holiday stress. When we pause to focus on what we’re thankful for, we shift our perspective away from stressors and towards the aspects of life we value most.
Take a few moments each day to reflect on three things you’re grateful for. They could be simple pleasures—a cozy moment, a warm drink, or a phone call with a friend. Practicing gratitude doesn’t erase stress, but it helps to create small pockets of positivity that make the season feel lighter.
Mindfulness, too, can help ground you. When you feel overwhelmed, try to slow down, take a few deep breaths, and bring your attention to the present. This practice can help ease racing thoughts and remind you that you don’t need to handle everything all at once.
For some, the holidays can be particularly tough, especially if you’re experiencing grief, loneliness, or mental health challenges. Don’t hesitate to reach out for support if you’re struggling. Talking to a trusted friend, family member, or mental health professional can make a difference.
Remember that it’s okay to not feel joyful during the holidays. If you’re struggling, allow yourself to feel what you’re feeling without judgment. The season is not always easy, but by giving yourself compassion, you honor your experience.
The holidays can be a time of joy, warmth, and connection, but they don’t have to be perfect or filled with high expectations to be meaningful. Often, the most special moments are found in simple, unplanned times—shared laughter, quiet mornings, or a small act of kindness. As you navigate the season, give yourself the gift of compassion. Letting go of stress and focusing on what truly matters can help you find peace and joy in the moments that mean the most to you.
This holiday season, let balance and self-compassion guide you, and take things one moment at a time. It’s more than enough.
What is one thing you’re going to do to allow the holiday season to be less stressful? Let me know! You can contact me via Instagram @kindmindpsych or via my email at psychologist@quickanddirtytips.com.
The Savvy Psychologist is a Quick and Dirty Tips podcast. It's audio engineered by Steve Riekeberg (RICKy-berg), with script editing by Brannan Goetschius. Our Podcast and Advertising Operations Specialist is Morgan Christiansen. Our Digital Operations Specialist is Holly Hutchings and Our Marketing and Publicity Associate is Davina Tomlin. Nathaniel Hoopes is our Marketing contractor. Follow Savvy Psychologist on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you listen to podcasts. That's all for this episode of Savvy Psychologist. Thanks for listening! I'll see you next week.