Losing a job often triggers unrecognized grief and a significant increase in stress and anxiety. In this episode, Dr. Monica Johnson looks at the emotional fallout of unemployment, from shock and anger to self-blame. She looks at how to navigate these feelings, reclaim your narrative, and establish a new routine that balances healing with proactive steps toward your next opportunity.
Losing a job often triggers unrecognized grief and a significant increase in stress and anxiety. In this episode, Dr. Monica Johnson looks at the emotional fallout of unemployment, from shock and anger to self-blame. She looks at how to navigate these feelings, reclaim your narrative, and establish a new routine that balances healing with proactive steps toward your next opportunity.
Find a full transcript here.
Savvy Psychologist is hosted by Dr. Monica Johnson.
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Job loss can feel like a gut punch or a cosmic betrayal. You show up, do your best, maybe even exceed expectations and then boom: your position vanishes without warning. Maybe it’s phased out, maybe there’s a round of layoffs, maybe your boss got a new mandate. Whatever the reason, this isn’t just about losing a paycheck—it’s about losing structure, identity, self‑worth, and sometimes purpose.
I’m mixing real talk, data, psychology, and some affectionate tough love to help you land on the other side of job loss stronger and maybe even better than before.
Welcome back to Savvy Psychologist, I'm your host, Dr. Monica Johnson. Every week on this show, I'll help you face life's challenges with evidence-based approaches, a sympathetic ear, and zero judgment.
When the job vanishes, what hits you isn’t just financial, it’s deeply psychological. Let me break it down:
Grief That Isn’t Always Recognized
Losing your job triggers grief, plain and simple. You're grieving routine, disruption, identity, status, or connections. Kübler-Ross’s famous grief stages—denial, anger, bargaining, depression, acceptance—apply here, too. The only difference? It’s disenfranchised grief: folks say “it’s just a job,” but it never feels that simple.
Anxiety and Depression Increases
Several studies show that job loss can lead to increased anxiety, depression, reduced life satisfaction, and even physical health issues.
3. Identity and Self‑Worth Take a Hit
Jobs carry identity. Lose the job, and sometimes you lose a sense of “who you are.”
4. Stress, Burnout & Emotional Exhaustion
Even if you weren't burnt out before, this shock brings fatigue—poor sleep, emotional drains, brain fog. Occupational stress and strain make you feel not only mentally exhausted but physically run-down.
5. Social Fallout
Unemployment can impact relationships. Research indicates that unresolved financial stress can erode intimacy and increase divorce risk. Job loss can also impact friend groups and other relationships. Being in the unemployed outgroup of any relationship can make you feel social backlash, even subtle stigma, adding an extra layer of stress.
You might find yourself swinging through emotional states like:
When you lose a job, most people jump straight to updating their résumé or scrolling job boards at 2 a.m. in a panic spiral. But let me lovingly interrupt that hustle mindset and say: we’re not going to “grind” our way out of grief. Recovery isn’t just logistical, it’s emotional, social, financial, physical, and even spiritual. Rebounding from job loss requires a whole-person approach.
Let’s start with the emotional piece because before we rebuild, we need to validate and name what we feel. Maybe you’re angry, embarrassed, numb, or strangely relieved. All of it is welcome here. Suppressing emotion doesn’t help you heal faster; it just delays the grief. So go ahead and say, “I’m disappointed,” or “I’m scared,” or “I feel rejected.” Name it. Sit with it. Research on emotional regulation shows that labeling our emotions is actually the first step to reducing their intensity. You might even create a small ritual to close that chapter—write a goodbye letter to your former self, light some sage, or take a long walk and talk it out with a friend. The point is: acknowledge the loss before you race to fix it.
Now, once you've honored the grief, it’s time to reclaim the narrative. This means shifting how you tell your story—both to others and to yourself. Instead of saying, “I got fired,” reframe it as, “My role was eliminated, and now I’m exploring new directions.” It might sound like semantics, but psychologists call this cognitive reappraisal and it’s one of the most effective emotional regulation tools we have. Rather than catastrophizing ("I'll never find work again."), remind yourself, “This is a tough chapter, but I’ve overcome worse.” Your brain believes what you tell it so make your inner monologue a little more Oprah and a little less inner saboteur.
Next, we need to talk about structure, because when a job disappears, so does your daily rhythm. No more morning meetings or afternoon check-ins. That sudden absence of routine can feel disorienting—like the world went quiet. One way to soften the chaos is by creating a simple daily routine that honors both healing and progress. Set a wake-up time, carve out blocks for job searching, exercise, hobbies, and—this is key—joy. Yes, I said joy. Watch that show. Bake those cookies. Blast Beyoncé at 11 a.m. if it feeds your soul. It’s easy to feel like you haven’t “earned” rest when you’re unemployed, but rest is part of the rebuild.
Speaking of rebuilding, this isn’t a journey you should take alone. Social connection is one of the strongest buffers against the psychological toll of job loss. Studies consistently show that social support mitigates depression and anxiety during unemployment. So this is your gentle nudge to call your people. Not just to vent—though that’s allowed—but to connect, brainstorm, and maybe even ask for help. Let someone review your résumé, introduce you to a contact, or just sit with you during a Netflix binge. Don’t isolate yourself. Your people want to show up for you. Let them.
Another powerful step is skill-building or creative exploration. This doesn’t mean you have to reinvent yourself overnight, but it could be the perfect time to take a free course, dabble in a new hobby, or rekindle an old passion. Learning activates a sense of competence and hope, and those two feelings are psychological gold when you’re healing. If you’ve always wanted to write, draw, code, or bake—go ahead. It might lead somewhere unexpected. Even if it doesn’t? You’ve gifted yourself joy and momentum, which are reasons enough.
Let’s also get practical about the money piece, because whew—nothing pokes the anxiety button like wondering how long your savings will last. First, file for unemployment benefits as soon as possible. They’re not a handout; they’re a bridge, and you paid into that system with every paycheck. Then, take a clear-eyed look at your finances. What’s essential? What can be paused or reduced? Talk to service providers; many have hardship programs. Call your credit card company. Make a budget that protects your dignity, not just your bills. This isn’t about shaming your spending—it’s about creating breathing room while you regroup. If you need additional support, look into community organizations, mutual aid funds, or faith-based services in your area. There’s no shame in receiving help when you’re in transition.
Now let’s revisit job searching but let’s do it with intention and boundaries. Start by tailoring your résumé to highlight your accomplishments, not just duties. Practice your interview responses. And if interviews or applications start to blur together, treat them like data: after each one, ask yourself what worked, what felt off, and how you can refine. Also, lean into networking. People hire people they know or people who know people they know. So set up a few 20-minute chats with folks in your field. Ask questions. Listen. Follow up with warmth. You’re not begging, you’re building community.
And finally—don’t underestimate the power of tending to your mind-body connection. Stress, especially chronic stress like unemployment, takes a toll on your nervous system. So move your body every day, even gently. Stretch, walk, dance, do yoga. Eat foods that nourish rather than numb. Get sleep. If anxiety or depression begin to take hold, reach out for mental health support. Therapy isn’t a luxury; it’s healthcare. You’re worthy of care, even when you’re not “producing.”
So no, this isn’t just about bouncing back. This is about rebalancing, re-centering, and redefining what you want and need moving forward. You don’t have to “return” to who you were before this job loss. You get to evolve. With intention, care, and community, you’ll not only find your next opportunity, you’ll grow into it with power.
If you’ve experienced job loss before, what helped you? Let me know! We can help each other! You can contact me via Instagram @kindmindpsych or via my email at psychologist@quickanddirtytips.com.
The Savvy Psychologist is a Quick and Dirty Tips podcast. It's audio engineered by Steve Riekeberg. The Director of Podcasts is Holly Hutchings. Our Podcast and Advertising Operations Specialist is Morgan Christiansen, and Nathaniel Hoopes is our Marketing contractor. Follow Savvy Psychologist on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you listen to podcasts. That's all for this episode of Savvy Psychologist. Thanks for listening! I'll see you next week.